Chapter 40

So sorry it's been pretty much forever since I've posted. I'm still around, don't worry, but on occasion my life happens to suck. Nothing major or awful has happened, but things just keep coming up and happening. There might be a small window in here where I can get some writing done, but then life is going to get crazy again for a bit. I can't promise anything, but hopefully it won't be this long again. I also have a kind of wacky idea. I had a dream the other night and when I woke up I realized I could totally turn it into a short story. I've already gotten a little bit of it written, but I'm not sure if I should post it or not, so I'm going to leave it up to you guys. It'll definitely be short, maybe 10-15 chapters. What I'm not sure of is how long it will take me to finish it. Do you want me to start posting it as I go, with possible long gaps between, or should I save it until I have time to finish? Your choice! Now on to our scheduled programming.....










It was quiet in my hospital room. It had been since the day before. There had been virtually no conversation between Patrick and I since my parents had walked out of the room. I was just spent and hadn’t been up to listening to an explanation of how Patrick had known my parents and they had known him. He hadn’t offered one up either.

He had stayed with me the rest of the day and night, but we’d just avoided talking. This morning looked like it was heading in the same direction. Patrick was here, sitting next to the bed, and we were just watching TV. The only other thing to do when you were stuck in a hospital bed was talk. I was ready to know now.

“Why did you go see my parents?” He turned his head and looked at me, not quite in surprise, but in uncertainty.

“I just wanted them to know what they’d done by not telling you that Vince was out of jail.” His explanation seemed true enough, it made sense, but he looked uneasy, like there was something else.

“You didn’t have to do that.” He let out a sigh and turned his entire chair to face me.

“There’s more.”

“What do you mean, ‘there’s more’?” I asked.

“I can’t stand what they did to you. When I got to the hospital and saw all the flowers and people that cared, I snapped. I wanted them to know that they didn’t just almost kill you by keeping things from you, but that they’d lost someone worth knowing. I wanted them to know that despite all they’d done, you’d become an amazing person in spite of them,” he said.

I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. It obviously made me think about that other thing we had to talk about. That whole, what are we going to do about our relationship now, thing. I knew I was going to have to start that conversation. It was me that ran out on him afterall. I figured now was as just as good a time as any.

“Patrick, I…..”

“Good morning, Miss Tunney. How are you feeling today?” my doctor asked, walking through the door, cutting me off.

“Better than yesterday,” I told him, like I had every other day he’d walked in here and asked.

He went over a few things, checking my chart, all the things doctor’s do when you’ve been laid up in the hospital for over a week. I had to pick a bunch of numbers on a scale of 1 to 10 to tell him how much things hurt, and so on. It was like being back in elementary school all over again.

“Well, Gabrielle, I have to say that things are going exactly the way we had hoped they would. I see no reason why we can’t discharge you today,” the doctor told me.

“Really? I can go home?”

I’d initially been excited and then the word hit me. Home. I didn’t have a home. Not one I could actually ever step foot into ever again. Where was I going to go? I forced a smile onto my face and thanked the doctor, even though I suddenly wished I had another week stuck in bed in a hospital.

“Do you have a way to get home?” he asked.

“I’ll give her a ride,” Patrick offered.

“Good. Then I’ll send a nurse in with the discharge papers in a little bit. You can set up an appointment to come back and see me so I can check on your progress.”

With that the doctor said goodbye and walked out of the room. I released a breath and turned to face the window. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Even if I managed to talk to Patrick before I was officially out of here, I didn’t think there’d be anyway that everything would be solved by then.

“So where am I taking you?” he asked.

“I can’t go home,” I whispered. Even just thinking about my apartment was bringing back some really bad memories that I only wanted to forget.

“No, I wouldn’t think you’d want to. Am I bringing you to Paige’s, a hotel?” he pushed.

I didn’t know how to respond or what to say. There was only one place I wanted to go, but it didn’t sound like it was going to be an option. I wanted nothing more than to have Patrick ask me to move in with him one more time. I wouldn’t make the same mistake and would accept this time around.

“I’m sorry,” I blurted out, surprising Patrick as he grabbed my things together.

“For what?” he asked.

“Walking out.” He sighed and sat down on the bed next to me.

“It hurt to come home and find that you were just gone, no explanation,” he told me. I’d never felt so ashamed about anything in my life.

“It’s not a good excuse, but I panicked. And then instead of just letting me take time you pushed even more on me. I wasn’t prepared and I didn’t know how to handle it. I’ve always run and so I did it again. I ran away from the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I’ve never regretted anything so much.”

The nurse came in then with the discharge papers. I went over everything, signing where I needed to. Then I made the appointment to return to see the doctor. When I was done, Patrick helped me out of the bed and into the bathroom so I could finally change out of the hospital gown and into my own clothes.

The nurse was waiting with the wheelchair when I came out. Patrick was already gone, having gone down to pull the car up to the door. Usually I would have fought taking the wheelchair out, but I was too weak and tired to fight. Patrick was there waiting when we got downstairs. He helped me into his car before he got in himself.

“If Vince hadn’t gotten to me, I was going to come see you Sunday,” I told him. I could tell that caught him off guard.

“Why?” he asked.

“To apologize for doing something I thought I was past doing. I panicked and I ran like I always used to do, and it wasn’t fair to you. Not after everything you’ve done for me. I shouldn’t have reacted like that. Most of all, I shouldn’t have lied to you.”

“I can’t say it didn’t hurt to find out that you would rather risk your own life than be with me.” A tear slipped down my cheek when he said that.

“I wasn’t thinking clearly. I thought I was. I thought I’d figured things out, but I hadn’t. It was just too many things all at once. My family, Vince, what you said, it was too much at once. Instead of being rational I threw away the best thing to ever happen to me. I can’t even imagine how badly I hurt you. I hate knowing that. I’m just so in love with you that I do crazy and stupid shit because I’m terrified that I’ll screw something up and then I just end up doing it anyway. I’d spend the rest of my life trying to make this all up to you if you’d let me, and even then I know it wouldn’t be enough.”

“Gabby, stop.” I did. I stopped talking. “Say it again.” I wasn’t sure what he meant. I looked at him, trying to figure it out when it hit me.

“I love you.”

“Jesus, I’d kiss you if I wouldn’t hurt you doing it.” I let out a small laugh as I lightly touched the split in my lip that still ached. “Am I pushing my luck if I ask if you’ll move in?” My smile grew.

“I was hoping you’d ask me again.” He smiled back at me and put the car into drive, taking us home.